Have you ever wondered why some people find it hard to trust others? Why some have a great fear of abandonment? While others constantly seek control, attention or admiration? The answer isn't always linked to a personality disorder. However, the way personality works can help us better understand thoughts, emotions, behaviour and relationships. In therapy, I often explain to clients that we all have different personality traits. However, some traits can become very strong and rigid. As a result, they can create difficulties in everyday life and in relationships with others.

What are personality disorders?

Personality disorders are persistent patterns in the way a person thinks, feels, behaves and relates to others. These ways of thinking and behaving are often hard to change and can cause problems in everyday life. When these traits are strong, last for a long time and significantly affect family, the couple relationship, social life, work or emotional well-being, we may speak of a personality disorder. According to the traditional classification of the DSM-5-TR, 10 specific personality disorders are described. They are organised into three main clusters.

Cluster A – Odd behaviour and detachment

1. Paranoid personality

Characterised by persistent mistrust and suspicion of people. The person may find it hard to trust others. For this reason, relationships with people can become more difficult.

2. Schizoid personality

The person may prefer solitude and emotional distance. They may also have less interest in close relationships and social activities.

3. Schizotypal personality

May be characterised by unusual thoughts, perceptions or behaviour. In addition, the person may experience difficulty forming and maintaining close relationships.

Cluster B – Intense emotions and impulsivity

4. Antisocial personality

This disorder is linked to a pattern of disregard for the rights of others. It may be accompanied by deceit, impulsivity and irresponsibility. Also, the person may have difficulty respecting social norms.

5. Borderline personality

Borderline personality disorder is linked to emotional instability and impulsivity. A strong fear of abandonment may also appear. Relationships can be intense and unstable. In therapy I may hear: "When I think someone is pulling away from me, it feels as if everything is collapsing." That is why therapy aims to help the person understand and manage their emotions better.

6. Histrionic personality

Characterised by heightened emotionality and a strong need for attention. The person may feel uncomfortable when they are not the centre of attention.

7. Narcissistic personality

Narcissistic personality disorder may involve an exaggerated sense of self-importance. There may also be a strong need for admiration and difficulty with empathy.

Cluster C – Anxiety and fear

8. Avoidant personality

This disorder is often linked to fear of criticism and rejection. The person may also experience feelings of inadequacy. They may want closeness with people. However, fear of rejection can make them withdraw.

9. Dependent personality

Characterised by a strong need to be cared for and supported by others. The person may find it hard to make decisions independently. What's more, they may experience a strong fear of separation or losing a relationship.

10. Obsessive-compulsive personality (OCPD)

This disorder is linked to perfectionism, order and the need for control. The person may attach great importance to how things should be done. As a result, flexibility and relationships with others can become difficult. It's important to know that OCPD is not the same thing as OCD.

Does having one trait mean we have a personality disorder?

No. This is a very important distinction. In therapy I may hear: "I'm very much a perfectionist. Does that mean I have a personality disorder?" The answer is: not necessarily. We may all have some of these traits. A personality disorder is not defined by a single behaviour. A diagnosis requires a professional assessment.

Can personality disorders be treated?

Yes. Psychotherapy can help identify patterns of thinking and behaviour. It can also help with managing emotions and improving communication. Over time, the person can build healthier ways of coping with difficulties and relationships. As a psychologist, one message I want you to remember is: don't turn a diagnosis into a label. Recognising some characteristics in yourself or someone else is not enough to determine a disorder. In the end, understanding personality is an important step towards self-knowledge. The diagnosis of a personality disorder, however, always requires a professional assessment. Note: This material is for information and education. It does not replace assessment, diagnosis or treatment by a qualified mental health professional. Write to us if you would like more detailed information